


Take it or Leave it

by sammi_jammi



Category: Hazbin Hotel (Web Series)
Genre: Asexual Character, Established Relationship, M/M, Misunderstandings, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-12
Updated: 2019-04-12
Packaged: 2019-12-30 19:30:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,261
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18321758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sammi_jammi/pseuds/sammi_jammi
Summary: Angel brags to his friends about the crazy, wild sex he and Alastor have. Of course, that's a lie.





	Take it or Leave it

**Author's Note:**

> I'm glad I'm finally done with this fic. I've been writing and revising for the past week and I'd like to start other ones thank you very much 
> 
> I wish i had more info on Husk and Cherri(I mean like everyone tbh)
> 
> Im kinda new to writing on this platform of writing so i didn't know it would publish on the date i actually started it lol!! But yeah i finished it on April 11 u3u

For as long as Angel could remember, sex has been a major part of his life. Living under the same roof with a cruel father who ruled the entire household with a iron fist and a overbearing brother who was too nosy for his own good, he needed a escape from his messy life. So drugs and sex have always been his to go pleasures.

He had sex constantly while he was alive, for money, for drugs, for self-pleasure. It never bothered him, no matter how many dirty looks he got or the many times he was told that he was going burn in hell.

Of course they were right, but he doubt it was the sex and more the he is a terrible human being with shitty morals.

In hell, not much changed except the dirty looks were more of a wanting lustful gaze. He'd be a liar if he said he was miserable down here because he wasn't. If anything, He felt freer than he ever did when he was alive. He had his freedom to do whatever he wanted without the constant nag of police on his back.

It was easier if you avoided the crazy psychos with machetes and multiple serial killers. Other than that, it was a sinners wet dream to live down here.

That is until Charlie and Vaggie came along with their repentance idea. They came to him on the streets after servicing some random stud, telling him he could avoid death that was to eventually come by saving his soul and releasing him to God's gates. What a load of bullshit if he says so himself but he agrees to stay. Mostly because they give him a free room with the safety to keep Fat Nuggets.

Now though, his reasons are different. He gave a shit. About Charlie. About Vaggie. It was humiliating to say he gave a fuck about them out loud but he tried other ways to show them without making it too obvious. He pretends not to notice their soft smiles and knowing looks when he brings them gifts or scares off any rude customer that enters the hotel.

He was close to the hotel patrons too, like Husk,no matter how many times he's told him to go him away or threatened to stab him with a broken beer bottle, and Cherri, someone he would consider his bestie. Even Nifty was nice. But the one that stuck out the most was Alastor.

He befriended the demon the moment Alastor arrived to the hotel, the confident and charismatic aura attracted him in ways he still couldn't describe. He had always been a fan of handsome men in power, ready to crush anyone in their way. He found the demon attractive that he couldn't resist flirting with him.The funny thing was that Alastor flirted right back, something that Angel didn't expect.

He's been dating the Radio Demon for a couple of months now, much to Vaggie's delight. They went on dates, usually out to the strip mall where they would window shop or eat at restaurants where they served cannibal meals(Angel usually ordered a salad, he wasn't much into human meat). Angel loves it the most when they went out to more private settings, like a secluded forest where they ate picnics or their own rooms where they watched horror movies and laughed at the idiots that got themselves killed. Angel adored every minute with him, he always looked forward to seeing his boyfriend.

Angel could honestly say he really likes Alastor, the type of like that keeps him awake all night. He enjoyed talking to Alastor, hearing him make a spectacle about small dumb things always brought a large smile to his face.

Though, he does notice something odd about the demon as the months pass. Everytime he's overly touchy and affectionate with Alastor, he becomes very stiff(and not in the good way) and makes an excuse that he needs to go pick up something from the dry cleaners. At two o'clock in the morning. There weren't even dry cleaners open at that time!

Angel is used to touching and flirty fleeting glances with his lovers, so he isn't used to how detached Alastor is with him. He isn't a horrible person to him, he's just cold when it comes to affection. Occasionally, Alastor will give his hands sweet kisses, as quick as they are. He savors those moments a little too much for his liking.

Angel wasn't one to keep his mouth shut, but he is a needy person. He didn't know much about how Alastor was raised but he knew that times were a bit different when Alastor was younger. It made him a little sad to think that his boyfriend grew up without any love. He didn't grow up with much love either but he had Molly to turn to when times were rough.

He needs some genuine advice about relationships. Maybe he should ask Vaggie or Charlie. He knows they been in a relationship long before he's met them but the thought of having to ask Vaggie, he cringes and decides against it.

 

Angel sips a bloody mary as he listens to two fellow prostitutes talk about things Angel could care less about. His mind was elsewhere, thinking about a certain red haired demon.

"Angel~." The female succubus,Snow, waves a hand in front of his face."You okay there?"

Angel blinks,"Oh! Yeah sorry, what were you saying?"

Snow and her curvy dolphin friend,Evelyn, look at each other with sinister grins.

"We were comparing dick sizes about certain demons we've had. We were wondering why you aren't putting your input?" Snow swirled her scotch,"Don't tell me that radio demon got you good! I've heard so much about him, he sounds like a scary douchebag. Eveyln tells me he broadcasts his killings live on the radio!"

Evelyn sighs dreamily,"It's kinda hot..."

"How can killing someone make you horny? Ugh, actually I don't wanna know,"Snow's face makes a disgusted face."You're a nasty bitch, I hope you choke on a cock."

Angel grimaces inwardly, but grins back tightly. Sure, Alastor was his boyfriend but not once has he stopped to listen him brutally murder some poor dumbass. No thank you. Not his cup of tea.

"Well...,"He didn't want them to know about how little dick he was getting, very embarrassing for someone like him."It's kinda hard to compare Alastor with anyone else. He's the most experienced lover I've ever had, I can't even keep up with him sometimes! Don't get me started on his dick! It's like-"He uses his hands to measure the fake measurements. He was exaggerating a bit, at least he thinks he might be. Alastor could have an eight inch dick for all he knows. "It's embarrassing actually, I've never had a lover as insatiable as him."He fans his cheeks, two of his hands covering his fake blush he is trying to hide.

Snow and Evelyn gape at him, eyes wide with shock. Angel feels kinda proud of his lie, just a little bit but he honestly feels like a cheat. He was good at making men weak to their knees, ready to please him with all they got. Every man except Alastor.

"No fucking way! How are you even walking!?"Snow shrieks, eyeing him suspiciously.

Angel smirks, taking a sip of his drink."A whore doesn't spill his secrets."

Both Evelyn and Snow burst out into crazy laughter and Angel snickers with them. But on the inside, he wants to throw this table over. He wants to smash the glass vase on the table onto both of their heads and be done with it. Maybe he could have Alastor kill them for him.

The laughter dies down and Evelyn chirps up,"Keep that man on a tight leash or he's going to be mine, no offense babe~"

"None taken! Trust me, he won't be moving on any time soon. Our sex life is constantly changing, it ain't never boring."He scoffs, rolling his eyes haughtily.

The rest of the time though, he starts to feel a little nervous. What if Alastor does become bored with him?

 

He slams the door behind him when he gets back to his hotel room, crashing onto his bed. "Can't even keep up with him? Psh, I wish! I can't even hold his hand without him running away!"

He sighs, turning his head to stare at the wall. "What's wrong with me? I fucking lied about stupid shit. Kinda pathetic. So what if we haven't had sex?" Burying his head back into his pillow, he moans.

He gets up from his bed after a few minutes of silence and heads to the only person he knows can make him feel better.

Knocking on Cherri's door, he waits outside impatiently. Moments later, she opens the door with a grin.

"Hey Dusty Butt, whatcha want?" She lets him him in then walks back to her desk.

"I need some advice Cherri, I don't know who else to ask. Well that's a lie but I don't feel like asking Vaggie."Closing the door behind him, he leans on her door.

"Alright, spill the beans."She is tinkering with the item in her hands.

"Me and Alastor haven't been intimate at all! Literally everytime I try to be intimate with him, he freezes like a deer in headlights and runs off with his tail between his legs!"

"Ahh, that radio freak. Maybe he doesn't want those sharp teeth near his dick." She snickers, still messing with the item in her hands.

"Pfft, trust me, he doesn't. He doesn't want my body near him at all! I know I'm not ugly either! So I'm a little fustrated, what I am doing wrong?" He sighs, going over to sit by her bed.

Cherri is silent, cursing when the little metal bear that Angel finally sees break apart in front of her. She groans with annoyance, tossing her screw and hammer onto the desk."Fuck this. I give up for now. I miss making my bombs, they were way fucking easier than this bullshit."

Angel examines the little bear critically, he agrees with her. Her bombs looked way better than whatever abomination layed in front of her."What are you even doing?"

"Charlie says that I should focus on making things that makes everyone happy instead of things that kill people. Like teddy bears."

She swings the metal bear off the table and turns to him, "I don't think you're doing anything wrong, but I do think you should wait a little longer before wanting to pounce on him. Not everyone here is a sex freak like you, boo. Or you can just seduce him into bed, works everytime!"

Angel smirks, liking that idea way better. He didn't know Alastor's kinks, but it did give him the excuse to run down to the sex shops.

"Of course if he's into necrophilia or gore, I suggest you run the opposite direction."

Days after his talk with Cherri, he had gone to plenty of sex shops across town. Making sure to only buy the best of the best, he wanted nothing but the best for Alastor.

Dropping the bags on his bed, he takes them out of their packaging with excitement. He had bought pink fuzzy handcuffs, bondage rope, jeweled buttplugs, XXL vibrators, XXXL dildos, candle wax, lube that heated up upon skin contact, nipple clamps and plenty of other things he hopes they can use later.

He wasn't going to show him everything but he was hoping to entice him with some of the items. Picking up the red corset with matching panties and stockings he bought, he changes into them. Inspecting himself in front of his big vanity, he whistles with praise.

The corset squeezed his waist tightly, pushing up his fluffy chest. The panties were tight on him, squeezing his ass in the right away and keeping his dick tightly packed. The stockings were silky soft and stopped mid-thigh.

"God, I'm so hot. I'd fuck me myself." Grabbing his red lipstick, he applies it on his lips.Afterwards, he applies fake lashes and fixing up his eyeliner. Posing sexually in front of the mirror always makes him feel confident and powerful.

Going over to the bed, he packs away most of the items. He leaves out the lube, fuzzy pink cuffs, and one of the vibrators. He takes the pink jeweled buttplug and works his magic with it. He was a pro with sex toys so he lubes himself up and slides it in with ease.

Now all he has to do is bring Alastor up to his room, only god knows where the demon could be. Using the hotel phone, he dials the front desk and tells Vaggie to notify Alastor to meet him up in his room once he returns.

A hour later, there's a knock on the door making Angel stand up from his magazine. He calls out for entry, positioning himself to sit straight up and legs crossed.

"Come in~"

Alastor enters the room with his signature grin, chirpy and lively."Good evening, darling! It was a long day today, so many demons to kill, so many demons to convince that salvation is near-" Alastor chokes when he sees Angel sitting on the bed with a seductive grin on his face.

"Hey baby~If work was that long, why don't you come relax~?"Angel pats the spot next to him, one of his other hands playing with the fur on his fluffy chest.

Alastor didn't budge from where he stood, stiff as a board and still grinning widely.

Angel wasn't going to give up, standing up and stops in front of him. He presses himself against the demon, squishing his rack against Alastor's own chest.

"I got myself ready for you, you know? I'm so wet down there, I bet you can slide right in."One of Angel's hands plays Alastor's bow, another undoing his buttons while the other two rest on his waist.

"A-Ah, Angel you seem...perky."Alastor gently pushes Angel away, laughing nervously."Hahah, isn't it a little late for this type of energy?"

Angel frowns,"It's only eight o'clock. I still have enough energy for a quick romp."

"Why yes! It's very late, you must be tired from working hard all day! I sure am!" He takes Angel's shoulders, leading him to the bathroom."You should relax, take a nice bubble bath, drink some champagne! I'll catch you tomorrow!" Pecking his cheek, he pushes him into his bathroom and closes the door behind him.

"What the fuck!? Alastor!?" He yanks the door wide open but Alastor is already gone."Seriously?! Ugh!!"

Fat Nuggets raises his bed from his bed as Angel came out of the bathroom in his pink bathrobe and a towel around his hair. Angel did decide to take a shower to cool him down, his arousal and anger. Now he only felt gloomy.

Collapsing on his bed, he closes his eyes with exhaustion. He feels Fat Nuggets climb onto the bed, oinking all the way and resting his head on Angel's stomach.

"Do you think I'm being too aggressive?" He picks up Fat Nuggets and squishes his own face against his snout."Cherri says not everyone is a sex freak like me. Maybe Alastor is one of those gentlemen who wait for marriage..."Thinking about it makes him laugh."Yeah. I doubt it. I need some answers."

Laying Fat Nuggets down on his chest, he decides he'll speak with Husk tomorrow. He knew Husk worked with Alastor in the past, maybe he could tell him a little more about his boyfriend.

 

Walking into the bar area of the hotel, Angel jumps onto the barseat, coming face to face with Husk. Husk is holding a bottle of whiskey, glaring at Angel.

"What do you want? It's too early for any of your shit."He grumbles, taking a swig of the bottle.

Angel pouts,"Can't a spider have a drink?"

Husk eyes him suspiciously,"A drink? Aren't you banned from alcohol?"

"Aren't you?"Angel retorts.

Husk grumbles, looking away but not putting his bottle down.

"Aw come on, Husky! I won't tell if you don't~."

Husk huffs,"Whatcha wanna order, pest?"

"Hmmmmm....have any cocktails? I prefer the sweet ones."

"How does that not surprise me."He grumbles, going off to make it.

While Angel waits, he looks around the bar. The large stool he is sitting on is a crimson shade and the bar table has reclaimed chestnut wood, shiny and new. Behind the bar was the alcohol, the wines neatly placed in the wine cellar in the wall and the liquors were on a mutiple shelves that lined the bar. There was a large black fridge, he assumed that's where all the beer was.

"Here."Husk slides the slim glass with pretty pastel pink and peach hues.

"Oooo! Did ya make me a Sex on the Beach?"Eyes sparkling with glee, he grabs the straw with two fingers and takes a sip."This is fucking good, Husk! Heaven on my tastebuds!"Grinning widely, he takes another sip and moans in delight.

Husk's white fur becomes a light shade of pink,"It's nothing, now will you leave me alone. I wanna get back to drinking."

"I'm serious! You're really good at this, no wonder Charlie hired you. This is the best Sex on the Beach I've tasted! Where did you learn your bartending skills anyways?"

"Casino. It was my part-time job after NAM, made some good money."He chuckles softly,"Made some good tips with my magic tricks too. Idiots were easy to scam."

"Pfft, I'm a little surprised honestly. I just saw you as a old angry drunk, but seems like theres more to ya~." It was a genuine compliment.

Husk huffs,"Stop that shit, what do you really want? You've only been around to annoy me or mess with the guests, you're not doing either. So spit it out."

Angel sighs dramatically, "Didn't think I was that see through but oh well. I wanted to ask you about Alastor." He looks him up at him, determined.

Husk's eyes flash with something but it's gone before Angel could figure out what it was, "Yeah? He causing you trouble?"

Angel shakes his head,"No, he ain't. If anything, I feel like I'm the one causing him trouble."

Husk lets out a bark of laughter,"I doubt it. You'd be dead and 6 feet under if you were. Trust me."

"Damn, don't need to get too dark on me." Angel winces,"I think Alastor is avoiding the intimate parts of our relationship. The touchy ones. I've fucked plenty of virgins but never have I met someone like Alastor. It's like he wants nothing to do with sex!"

Husk stares at him with a raised brow,"Alastor doesn't do sex. He doesn't do sex or relationships. I thought you knew this. Obviously, he doesn't seem to mind the whole relationship thing anymore with the whole relationship you both got going on. But other than that, I doubt he'll ever wanna lay in the same bed with ya."

Angel looks at him in shock,"What? You mean Alastor..has no interest in sex? Are ya for real?"

"That's what I'm saying, you moron. I don't understand the whole sexuality thing either but that's him."

"No interest...in sex?"He repeats, confused. Everyone was interested in sex. Right?

"Wrong."Vaggie says when he goes to her next about this whole situation, hoping she'd clear things up for him.

"Huh?"He watches her dumbfounded, slumping over."There are people out there who don't...have sex?"The thought of never having sex horrified him, how can nobody have sex? Sex was the bomb!

Vaggie is glaring at him, closing the guestbook with annoyance."Wrong. Not everybody is interested in sex, you fucking idiot. I know sexualities weren't talked about in your time, but it's kinda sad you haven't even updated your knowledge."

"Hey!"He glares back, arms crossing."Where am I suppose to go? The library? Cuz if ya haven't noticed, most libraries here are ransacked."

"The internet is also a option!" She pulls out her phone, shoving it in his face."There's literally thousands of websites on here!"

"I don't have a phone! Not everyone is blessed with a rich girlfriend."

"Alastor is literally the most influential demon out there."Vaggie deadpans.

"I don't think he understands what a phone is..."He mumbles out. It was cute actually. The most feared demon didn't know what a phone was.

Vaggies sighs, massaging her temples."Both of you are hopeless. Considering that he's a manipulative dickhead and you're a stupid thirsty thot, it doesn't surprise me."

Angel was about to retort when she silences him with a finger to his lips,"Just be quiet for once and listen. I'm going to help you understand recent sexualities. And don't be a ignorant bitch about it either."

Angel decides to shut it. He wanted to understand Alastor, even if it meant spending a whole day with Vaggie. He just hoped he didn't fuck it up.

"...Okay, I'll do it."

 

Angel stops in front of Alastor's door later that night, nervously fiddling with whatever his hands could grab onto. The last time he spoke to Alastor was yesterday night when he tried to seduce him.

He had done his research with Vaggie. They had gone through plenty of websites that spoke of sexualities he's never heard of before. Out of all the sexualities he learned, Asexuality stuck out the most. The lack of sexual attraction to others or lack of desire for sexual activity. It described Alastor perfectly. His "no touchy" was more of a personal preference since asexuals didn't mind romantic affection he had read.

Which led to a guilty fear that he harbored since this morning, he had overstepped himself with Alastor. If he had known about this whole asexuality thing, he wouldn't have tried so hard to get the demon to fuck him. All he did was make Alastor uncomfortable and put him in a position he's never wanted to put anyone through when it came to sex.

He curses inwardly, mentally slapping himself. Now was not the time for overthinking, he needed to speak to Alastor. He just hoped Alastor would understand.

Knocking on the door gently, he calls out softly. "Alastor? You in there?"

A few moments pass before the door is opened revealing Alastor in his striped pajamas.He was grinning sleepily, eyes drooping halfway. The moment his eyes adjusted to Angel, his grin widens and he perks up happily.

"Ah Angel! Come in! It's always great to see your face, my love." He steps aside, letting Angel enter.

Angel strides in, sitting at the red armchair by his bed. His nerves were making him queasy and jumpy.

"Did you need something? I'm afraid I'm too tired for a date but tomorrow we can go out and do whatever you want!" Alastor closes the door and sits across him on the bed.

"W-Well, I wanted to talk about the other night."He rubs the back of his neck, looking up to meet Alastor's eyes."I just wanted to say I'm sorry. If I had known you weren't interested in sex, I wouldn't have done all those things. I may be a whore but I'm not a sexual deviant."

Alastor's grin is replaced with a surprised expression."Angel...It's okay. I should have told you about my disinterest in sex. It doesn't mean I'm not interested in you, of course! But the whole touching is something I don't think I'll ever be comfortable with. I'm surprised you figured it out, I still don't understand it much myself."

"I did some research on it actually...,"Angel replies embarrassed, "Plus I had some help so I could understand this whole thing. I promise I won't be as touchy, but I am a needy spider so I may steal a kiss or two."

"Yes, you are. Very needy, loud and obnoxious."Alastor full grin comes back, ears flicking."It's like I have a dog more than a lover."

"Pfft, that's me. Take it or leave it."

Alastor gazes at him warmly, "Taking it."

Angel feels his cheeks warm up,"God you're such a sap sometimes. It's kinda gross."

Alastor laughs,"Take it or leave it."

"Haha, I see what you did there.But..I'll take it."

"Would you like to stay and watch a movie?"Alastor pats the spot next to him.

"Really?"Angels eyes sparkle with surprise and excitement,"I get to pick the movie!"

"As long as it isn't a romanctic comedy that's fine with me!"Alastor switches on the tv, relaxing back on the bed.

Angel eyes water dramatically, "God, you're so perfect for me. Let's watch Psycho!"

Getting comfortable, Angel leans against the bed board. As the movie starts, Alastor bumps his shoulder, making him look over.

"Yeah?"

"You can lean on my shoulder if you want."

Alastor didn't have to tell him twice because he's already squishing his face against his arm, smiling to himself. He may have grown up with sex and drugs but this is a new kind of addiction he could get into.

"Oh, one last thing."Angel mumbles out,"I may or may not have told some demons that we have crazy sex and that you have a big dick..."

"Oh Angel..."


End file.
